Oh boy, what a week I’m in store for! As I write this I can be sure, though I don’t really know what by, that I’ll be very busy, and I worried if I’d get to sit down and write this. But I thought, ‘no! If there’s one thing I must do, it’s whack one out!’
So here I am, on the raggedy edge (yes, I’m quoting Nathan Fillion. I’d call it a guilty pleasure, but I don’t feel an ounce of guilt!), hoping that I get to finish this on time, so that, come Friday, I can say a TFIF. Thank Fuck It’s Friday. Why, you may ask, am I bringing this up? Why am I taking my sweet time getting round to my subject? Why am I wearing a tutu? And why am I speaking like a question-talker? Well, I come here today to detail this month’s Blog of the Month! And this writer is known, at least by me, for his habit to be a question-talker. That is, asking a question of himself out loud, and then answering it himself. He is also known, in the bulk of his blog, to write TFIF blog posts.
He is a man who is known for his weird sense of humour, for his tush, for his love of food, for his bad typing (his words, not mine), for his new podcasts on JK, for popping up all over the place on JK recently, and for his love for a kitty. Ahem. I should perhaps qualify that, so that it makes sense. I’ll get to that in a moment.
Yes, my freaky darlings, I am, of course, talking about Cornish TUSHIE Pasty. Yes, we know him by Cornish, Tushie, Pasty, or even Pasty Man (that’s not a slight against his pallor. Not that I’m aware of, at least). He writes a blog known as ‘The Tushie Express’ or ‘The Real CTP’ – whether that’s in ode to the real Slim Shady, I’ve not a dicky bird (clue), but judging from his song choices, it’s a distinct possibility. Calm down. I know it’s tempting to shoot those who like rap, but I ask you to put them away in favour of water pistols, filled with alcoholic beverages of your choosing.
Onwards to the real crux of the matter. The kitty comment. Oh, bugger, I’m jumping the gun. I should, perhaps, tell you of the blog. It is a rather new blog, made of only a handful of posts. This is because he did have a previous blog, but, in his own words:
Thats not the only reason for a new blog though, I feel that I can use a blog the way I always wanted to, to write about my life, explain my thoughts and at times go on very long, pointless rambles about things that went through my mind, after all thats what the internet does, it gives people a place they can ramble on and on about whatever they want. So not only will I start doing more of what I enjoy by letting my mind and imagination run free I will also be sharing it with all those who wander my way.
I can only presume from this that these needs were not being met by his last blog, and so he reinvented himself on therealctp to do exactly that. Luckily, this means there’s only a few to catch up on, so you won’t lost a day in doing so. Which is handy for blog writers who are reviewing said blog…
In his blog he is very introverted. He talks of things that have happened in his life: moving house, his work, being a psychology student, his diet, and his kitty. Okay, I’ll let you in on the secret. He is not in love with a kitty of the feline persuasion. Nor is he in love with vaginas. That is to say, he likes vaginas, and I’m sure he’s explored a few in his time, but it’s not as if he loves a woman’s kitty, and only the kitty. No. I am talking about his beau, Kitty. Who is a woman. Sorry, I felt I should clarify that last bit. Just in case I confused you.
He also speaks about what is on his mind from time to time. I refer you to two instances, his Dreams post, and his Destiny Vs. Free Will And Their Own Private Boxing Match Inside My Head. Two posts which I particularly enjoyed, and got me thinking – which is no mean feat! Though I won’t share my thoughts on them. This is, after all, Tushie’s time in the limelight. I assure you I’ll take it back when I’m done and hog it for the rest of the week.
Another peculiarity of his is to end his posts with a song. Tushie is a man of eclectic tastes, and his song choices often reflect that – though there’s a tendency to lean towards rap, which culminated with the inclusion of one song which I just can’t justify. Which I must demand be removed. Its presence has already stained my mind and gotten itself stuck in my head. And it’s given me a cold, too! Yes, the offending song? Can’t Touch This by MC Hammer. Naturally.
It is time, now, for me to depart this mortal coil – or, at least, depart this wordpress coil – and go on to greener pastures – the fridge -, and so I leave you all with an invite to join The Tushie Express. Hope you have a fun ride!
This is JV – signing off.
Finger On The Button 