Good morning, my kinky darlings.
Today I write not about something whimsy, or fun, but something far darker than in previous posts. Today I elaborate on something called Ravishment Play. Or, to use the more common name – Rape Play. This is brought about by a thread on the JE that talked about Forced Sex. I found some irregularities in the opening post, indicative of possible misunderstanding by the public at large, and so I thought it should be discussed on here. First, let me be clear, Ravishment Play and rape are too distinctly different things. I myself do not practice either, and am not turned on by either – but I do know enough of ravishment play to act as a teacher, for today. At least, to a certain extent. Beyond that, you’re on your own, dude.
Ravishment Play is where a couple (or even group) enact a role play scenario where one is forced to endure sexual manipulation by another person(s) – but it is done by consent. That is key to the whole thing. If at any time anyone in the role play decides he or she doesn’t want to do it (by using a predetermined safe word), then it’s game over. To continue beyond that turns it into the heinous crime of actual rape, and thus wholly wrong. I think it safe to say that nobody wants to be raped; but people do want sex with a ‘consensual force’ edge to it. The terms of ‘play-rape’ and ‘rape fantasy’ aren’t ones that are favoured by these people (Though some do, I should make clear, perhaps because that’s the phrase it was called when they came to know about it), because that implies that it is anything but consensual, and such terms often confuse people into thinking that some people really do want to be raped. This, I believe, is what happened in that thread. So what is it these ravishees want? I turn, as ever, to the internet. Because we’re already on the internet. It seemed to be the smartest place to look.
- Primal passion – Ravishment fantasies appeal to primal emotions of lust, aggression and fear, which are often intertwined with one another.
- Physical intensity – Many ravishment fantasies and scenes involve highly physical restraint and resistance. Sex is, after all, a physical act, and intense physicality often expresses and feeds into emotional intensity.
- Paradox and contrast – There is an innate paradox to fantasizing about being “forced” to do something you want done, not to mention the contrast of desire and pleasure with fear and aggression.
- Sweet surrender – For some, it is not resistance or struggle that is the turn-on so much as submission. Being helpless and overpowered allows a “letting go” of anxiety, guilt and inhibition, and an opening to sensation, pleasure and trust.
- Simply irresistible – There is also the desire is to be desired oneself, of the ravishee seeming to overpower in terms of her or his allure, and the ravisher the one who “surrenders” to overwhelming passion.
- Catharsis and closure – Some survivors of sexual assault may find a sense of resolution or healing with a ravishment scene. Such cathartic release is not limited to survivors, however. A person who feels guilty about sexual pleasure, or is troubled by what they consider a “dark and dangerous” fantasy, may also experience this sense of release once their fantasy is made flesh. (from ravishmentinfo.blogspot.com)